Sunday, March 22, 2009

Off and running!

So we worked everything out with the pharmacy's and RE. I started my Lupron and we have another week to come up with the money for the Follistim. We actually got a letter from the insurance company stating that the lab that will be doing our PGD is not in network therefore we are responsible for 80%. We were under the impression that PGD was not covered at all, and that the entire amount would be out of pocket. So the news that we will be getting back 20% was actually a pleasant surprise. Maybe its a sign of positive things to come!

I'm starting to get really nervous about this cycle, this is really happening. Yes, this is not our first IVF cycle, but we have a lot more invested in this one. I can't help but worry about whether it will work, and we will have put out all this money to be devastated again. I am worried that like the last time they will have to cancel the PGD because our embryos are not strong enough. Or what if they test the embryos and find that all the embryos are affected by the inversion? Or worse, what if we successfully do the PGD, get pg and still have a m/c? At that point we would have done all of this just to be right back where we started. I am terrified that the inversion may not be the cause of our loses. I am also terrified that this cycle will determine if we will ever have a biological child together.

I am going for acupuncture tomorrow, I hope this will help reduce some stress and give me some peace of mind.

I find myself repeating this to myself daily, but I am so done with this. I just want this to be the cycle that makes us parents!

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