First OB appointment today-9wk6d

I was worried they weren't going to do an u/s but they did and it was wonderful! We could actually see his head, torso, arms and legs it was amazing! He actually looks like a baby. The Dr said he was very cooperative and we got an amazing picture of him, looks like we have a little ham! We got to see him moving around which was so cool. It was all to much for me to handle!

My friend referred him to me and she loves him, and now I can see why! He is so nice, down to earth, and easy to talk to. He is the only one in the practice so I asked if he would be delivering and he told us he has only missed 2 births in his career. One of which was when he was stuck in NYC during 9/11. That was pretty comforting, I don't want to show up that day to find a total stranger is delivering me.

We really didn't have a lot of questions for him. My Dh asked how to get me to relax and stop worrying. Then he said the most wonderful words, he told us that at this point I have a 1% chance of m/c. Now I know I can easily be that 1% but I felt this huge load lifted from my shoulders. I asked him to please tell my Dh that I can have chocolate and he explained to my Dh that chocolate actually has little to no caffeine in it. So :oP !!! He also told me not to listen to all the advice I am going to get from everyone I meet.

He does want me to go for an NT scan even though we had the PGD so I have to schedule that for 2wks. This is fine with me! Means I get to see the little man again!

I go back for my 2nd OB appt on the 13th. It seems forever away, but I also know it is going to be a very uneventful appt. I am just a normal pg women at this point. But as long as everything continues to go well I'm ok with that!

Had another scare last night-8wk1d

So last night I had another bleeding scare. I called the nurse on call and she explained that bleeding during early pg is common and not to worry unless I was filling a pad in less then an hr. She asked if I was cramping which I wasn't, told me to keep my feet up and drink lots of fluids and come to the office in the morning. I wasn't due to go back till Tuesday, and that was going to be my last appt with the RE.

We went in this morning and everything looked good, the heartbeat was 178 and he is actually starting to look like a baby now not some sort of alien lol. She showed us his head, heartbeat, chest, and little arm buds. Sooo cute! I am so in love with this little guy!

So this was our last appt, I will have to go back again just for blood work, but that was it. It was bittersweet. I have waited so long to be released from my RE, and it is exciting that we have made it this far, but I am also scared. There is this comfort in going in every week and getting bw and an u/s. As I walked out with Dh I said thats probably the last time we will get to see him for awhile. =(

I am looking into buying a doppler so I can listen to the heartbeat at home. I think thats going to be the only thing that gets me through when I don't get to see the OB as often.

Christmas is quickly approaching and I can't wait to tell our parents. For so long the holidays have not been fun or joyus but this year I am so looking forward to them! I still can't beileve that I have been blessed with this little miracle!

So I didn't get released today- 7wk4d

They did bw and an u/s and everything looked good. He's measuring a day behind but the dr said with the measurements he looked great. His heartbeat was 153, so we were very happy with that. He's doesn't look like a blob anymore!

As the Dr was leaving she said we'll see you next week. I said I thought this was our last appt? She said that she thinks they can squeeze another one in as long as insurance doesn't have a problem with it. I of course am totally fine with this, it means I get an extra u/s and who am I to argue lol.

They reduced my PIO and estrace so I will have to go back again the following week just to make sure everything is good off the meds. That's a little scary but all I can do is hope that at this point my body knows what it's doing.

Another big day tomorrow-7wk3d

So tomorrow I get released from my RE, EEEK! For the last 4yrs I have watched women leave the RE's office for the last time, they have this glow, smiling from ear to ear, u/s pic in hand, and I have always wondered what that would feel like. But tonight as I get ready to be released I now know what it feels like, it's totally terrfying! This doesn't happen to me, it seems like a dream, I am just waiting for something to go wrong. I hate having that attitude and I wish that I could just enjoy every moment, but I am just so scared! It makes me sad that I have wanted this for so long and now I am here worrying it all away. I can't wait to see my little guy again tomorrow, and hear the wonderful sound of his heartbeat.

My appointment with my OB is the 16th. I have to go a whole week without an u/s, I really hope they do one at the first appointment. I will lose my mind if they don't! How am I going to go 4 weeks at a time without an appointment? My poor Dr I may just drive him crazy withing the first week.

I am so over whelmed. I want to do everything right for this little guy, I want to eat all the right things, get all the right vitamins, drink the right amount of water etc. It's so hard though, I really have no idea what I am doing. It's funny after all this time trying to get pg, I never took time to find out what to do after I got pg. There are just so many rules! It's overwhelming, and scary! I feel all this pressure to do all the right things, I don't want to f&ck this up! I bought "What to expect when your expecting" and I am thumbing through it, talk about over whelming! Part of me is still afraid to read to much, just in case anything should go wrong. After this appointment I will throw myself into it!

I sent my Dh a link to this blog www.hisboyscanswim.com,its really cute and gives them an idea of where the baby is in terms they can understand. Last week at our u/s as I was getting dressed I said something about it still being so small. He responded with, "he's only the size of a lug nut" lol it cracked me up that not only did he actually look at the blog, but he knew where we were in development. Then the other day we were driving and he said it was the size of a blueberry. I asked him how he know that, and he said I read it in your book. I can't believe that he actually looked through my book! So cute, I love him and know he's going to be an amazing dad!

Ok I think I have rambled on long enough. I will post again tomorrow when we get back from the u/s. Fingers crossed everything is great!

Happy Thanksgiving-7wks

Over the last 4yrs I have learned to hate the holidays, and often found it hard to be thankful for all of the things I do have in my life. This year it is as if the light has been turned on and I can finally see how much I truly have to be thankful for....

My wonderful husband who is my rock and without him I don't know where I would be. My loving family who support us and love us the way only family can. Great friends who have stuck by our side through thick and thin. And of course our little miracle, who I am truly thankful to have been blessed with.

I'll never tire of this feeling-6wk5d

After everything that happen on Friday I spent most of the weekend worrying and over analyzing my every twinge and lack of symptom. I got little to no sleep last night, just terrified that I was going to go in today and his heartbeat would be gone. But........Everything is perfect! He is measuring exactly 6wk5d and his heartbeat was 128. I'm so relieved! I think I might actually start to enjoy this now. I get released next week and my RE told me to make an appt with my OB for 2wks from now. I can't believe this is really happening, someone pinch me!

I am Blessed-6wk2d

After having a bunch of dreams that my beta didn't rise, and that my progesterone dropped, and waiting all morning for them to call with my results, I finally called them.

I got the answering service, and had to wait for someone to call me back. They did call back rather quickly but of course it seemed like forever, especially when you convince yourself its bad news.

Beta was 22, 262, she said progesterone was good and that everything looked good.

I always said I wouldn't create a ticker till after I saw the heartbeat. Well I saw and HEARD the heartbeat. So I am proud to have posted my first ticker!!!!

I don't know why I am lucky enough to have finally gotten pregnant, or why after bleeding so much I got to see and hear a healthy little heartbeat, or why after all of this my numbers are still good and rising. But I do know that I am blessed, and that I am thankful for this blessing I have been given. I will enjoy each day, hope for the best, and continue to pray for the strength to get me through whatever lies ahead.

Today I am feeling very blessed!